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Remember Michael Scott grilling his foot on a George Foreman grill and declaring a "serious disability"? That's us in 2025—masters of the overblown personal crisis while scrolling past climate headlines to look for a heartwarming story about a 7-year old who turns leftover peanut butter jars into homeless shelters for gay mockingbirds.

We've become experts at compartmentalizing catastrophes. A shrug, a quick eye roll to the camera as another temperature record breaks. The notification disappears; our attention shifts.

But what if we could apply some behavioral economics to this problem and start with something deceptively simple?

One. Single. Dollar.

Your bank account is living a perfectly severed life. In your outie world, you're dutifully sorting recycling and driving your hybrid, while your innie dollars are trapped in a financial Lumon basement, forced to refine numbers for oil pipelines without any memory of your environmental values. This isn't corporate fiction—it's banking reality.